Terror – Part Two – By Hans

It took about a week for Terror to stop glowing.

And in case you are interested, there are NO Paranormal Veterinarians.  If any Paranormals have pets, they are usually cats and dogs and non-magical creatures, which are seen by human veterinarians. And before you ask about the Shifters, they have their own doctors which specialize in their unique physiology.

There are a few others who treat all Paranormals, but they are pretty rare and are scattered across the globe. The Dragon healer, Bar’ella is one of them and I believe she has responsibility for North America.

Since we couldn’t take Terror into the vet, Megan and I monitored him closely. Other than the glow, he was his normal puppy self. Rambunctious and energetic.

His glow dimmed when he napped and brightened when he woke up.

Do you know how hard it is to sleep with a nightlight that dims then brightens repeatedly during the night?

I thought Terror was sleeping through the night. He isn’t. He naps for a couple of hours then is awake chewing on a toy or roaming around the bedroom for an hour or two before napping again. And the process repeats… all night long.

The glow was not as bright after a couple of days, and by last night it was completely gone. Which is a relief. I may actually be able to get an uninterrupted night’s sleep.

However something new has come up. I think this is officially beyond me and I am going to have Megan ask the healer for help.

Things have begun to manifest.

Chew sticks.

Treats.

Squeaky balls.

I wonder if Bar’ella makes dungeon calls?

Terror – Part One – By Hans

It started off innocently enough, as most things do. Megan had found out about an estate sale of one of my acquaintances, Yorek Jameson.

The thing that amuses me the most is that the humans who bought the house were selling all of his things, magical and non-magical together. Apparently he slipped through the cracks and the Elite managed to lose him as did the Mages. Which I highly approve of.

As Terror likes to go out and about with us, we took him along. He was a well behaved gentleman, not jumping up on strangers, but somehow always managing to get people to pet him.

We left early so we could buy all the Magical items before the humans could. And overall I was able to add to my collection of torture devices and texts. There were two items however, that I do not think I would have much use for. One was a small notebook where Yorek kept his spell ideas. Ah yes, perhaps I have failed to mention the male was a low level Mage. He dropped out of the Mage program at Stanford to pursue his career as a torturer.

The second item was a bizarre looking tchotchke. It had a magic aura so my beloved bought it.

We were lucky to leave with our purchases before representatives from Mage Council and Elite arrived.

One fact to keep in mind, animals can sense magic, as evidenced by Terror’s insistence that he walk on the other side of Megan away from me, while I carried our purchases home.

Once home, I put everything away except for the notebook, intending to look through it for anything interesting. I left it on my bedside table which looking back now, was a mistake.  Megan and I sat down to watch television.

A few minutes into a documentary on the Spanish Inquisition,  strange sounds emanated from the bedroom.

I rushed into the room to see the notebook in shreds and Terror happily munching away on the leather cover.  And then he began to glow…

Toy? – by Deidre

Okay get your mind out of the gutter. I don’t mean _those_ kind of toys.

This is about a child’s toy. An addictive child’s toy.

Yesterday evening while I waited for Cyn at the coffee shop, I was approached by small child, who put a _thing_ on the table. She then waved and ran after her parent leaving the shop.

It resembled a tube of sorts with layers, about three inches high. What was it supposed to do? I sat staring at it, waiting. Nothing happened. Poking it with a straw didn’t seem to produce a reaction either.

Nor were there any electronic type thingys that I could see.

Cyn sat down and wanted to know where I got the Slinky. And then she explained what the hell it was.

I’ll be the first to admit I was dubious. How could a metal spring be entertaining? She picked it up and began to play with it. I’m still not convinced it’s a toy.

So she challenged me to a race. We finished our coffee and went to the toy store where she purchased one for herself.

We headed back to her apartment building which has a steep staircase.

We perched at the top of the stairs and on the count of three we launched the Slinkys. I’ll admit that it was mildly entertaining. Until her slinky won. I have one word for that… re-match!

That’s how we spent most of the evening last night. Slinky races. It’s silly, but strangely addictive.

Sometimes I don’t think I’ll ever understand humans or their inventions.

Who would have ever though such an innocuous toy could be so entertaining?

Shifters – By Cyn

Just a quickie today…

Shifters are a secretive bunch, preferring to stay in their own packs and groups, except when working for the Elite. And until I can find a Shifter to give you the down and dirty details of their lives, I’ll just give you what I know.

From what I’ve seen, the only Shifters are predators, with one exception, but I won’t go into his story, you’ll be able to read about him soon enough.

On the night of the full moon, Shifters must change into their animal forms and remain that way until the full moon sets at dawn. If they don’t, they’ll be trapped in their animal forms until the next full moon.

One misconception I do want to clear up…  A bite from a Shifter will not turn you into one of them. You need to have the specific genetic marker to be able to be turned. And even then, it’s a long and complicated process. I’m not sure of all the specifics, but I believe it takes more than three bites and is pretty damned painful.

They also tend to live a long time. Not as long as Vamps, but much longer than Mages and humans. Being immune to magic helps as well, which of course the Mages don’t like one bit.

Okay I think that’s everything. I’ve got to get off of here… they’re taking down my internet access for a few hours. Have a good weekend.

Terror – by Hans

Before I begin, I would like to clarify the title. This post is about Terror the new puppy, not about instilling fear into the hearts of Paranormals. Thought that may be a good topic for later. I always have trouble coming up with something to say.

Terror. I should have named him Trouble instead. Are you aware of the difficulties in attempting to dungeon train a puppy? The only good thing is that my torture room has a stone floor with a large grate in the floor for washing away blood, bodily fluids and other bits. Still, we are trying to train him to go outside during walks, but he insists on using one corner of the dungeon floor. Right under the rack, which makes cleaning up an ordeal.

Terror has found a new source of entertainment. He loves to chew on the leather straps that I use for restraints, as well as the leather whips and masks. He seems to ignore the chew toys Cyn and Megan purchased for him.

He is fast and likes to run and play chase… with the whip in his mouth. Sometimes tripping over the longer cords that he has not managed to chew down.

He loves rawhide, and bully sticks so we may stick with those for now.

Oh and a piece of advice for anyone considering getting a dog or puppy. There are several books published that will let you know what to expect at each stage of development. I suggest reading up on how to train your animal if possible BEFORE you bring the dog or puppy home. Because having patience with on the spot training is a must.

My suppliers must be wondering at the increase in torture accessory orders this past month.

And there he goes with another whip in his mouth. Excuse me while I try to get it away from him.

Secret Agent Spoofs – by Cyn

I love them!

Deidre and I have been watching Get Smart.

She’d seen it a couple of times when she was here before, but now we’re marathoning it.

Wouldn’t it be fun to have a hallway with all those doors? While I would normally think so, there is, in Shadow Earth, one of these corridors. It leads to the Council chambers and unfortunately both Deidre and I were forced down the hallway against our wills. I seem to remember seven or eight different doors. Oh and light scans. There wasn’t any theme music though, which would have made the experience so much more enjoyable. And being thrown before the Council wasn’t all ponies and rainbows either.

Two words.

Scared shitless.

But enough of the icky Council. Onto gadgetry!

Shoe phones, watch phones, robot agents, pen bombs, bugged bugs… some of the gadgets were  more silly than practical. However I didn’t let that stop me from trying to find my own finger gun. (And it really works too! The only problem? Bad guys don’t take it very seriously… oh and it only has one bullet.)

Acme has a line of actual working replicas of many spoof spy gadgetry. However I hesitate to buy from a company called Acme, if you know what I mean.

Now if only the Alliance were like Kaos, bumbling and slightly incompetent, but they’re not. They’ve got sinister plotting down to a fine art. I suppose if that were the case, the Elite would have put them out of business ages ago.

But it’s fun to sit and watch the antics of Agent 86 and Agent 99. Oh and Fang of course!

Hmm wonder how Hans is getting on with the puppy?

Anyway Deidre’s here and we’re going to have a couple of drinks, and some popcorn while watching the further adventures of Maxwell Smart.

Sore Losers – by Deidre

I can’t believe what poor sports those holier-than-thou males are. So we females won the bet and my manly Vamp has to dress in drag. Big deal, right?

Well apparently it is because he and his partners in crime are having hissy-fits because they lost. Apparently they think that MA is against them.

No matter how much I point out that they’ve each found the love of their lives, their reason for living. No, that has no bearing on the fact that MA is unfair.

I really want to sit my Vamp down and calmly smack him upside the head.

Guess what? Life isn’t fair.

It never has been nor, will it ever be.

Deal.

If you think it’s so bad for you now, trying living someone else’s life for a day. Then come back and tell me that you still feel sorry for your pitiful self. You, who never suffered hardship, who’s always had all the opportunities and none of the pain and strife. You who has never been judged and sentenced by public opinion before anyone got to know you.

I. Dare. You.

I dare you to spend a day in the life of any female in Shadow Earth then come back and complain that life’s not fair.

Not easy is it? Not easy to be downtrodden, felt to be made inferior, felt to feel that you’re worthless until some male comes along and becomes your reason for living. Not easy, not being allowed to attend school, take and interest in politics, hell, take an interest in anything other than procreating.

Welcome to my fucking world.

Sorry for the rant, but it’s one of my hot buttons.

I will say this though, if Damien doesn’t shape up, his ass is on the couch for a long long time.

Idiot Elite – by Cyn

You would not BELIEVE what I found on the desk in James’ office!

Ooooh it makes me so… just…ARGH!

I’ll share and let you decide… but for now, James is going to be sleeping on the couch, or better yet, in his own damned bed… without ME!

****

Dear MA,

We, the undersigned members of the Elite Magical Protection Force, insist you cease and desist all subversive activities. Your flagrant disregard for the rules of Shadow Earth, rules which you yourself developed, is not only disrespectful, but has societal ramifications beyond your comprehension.

We understand that you, being female, want to be sympathetic to the females of this world. But by letting the females win, you are setting unreal expectations which we feel will negatively impact their delicate psychological well being, as well as setting an unnatural precedent which will destroy society as a whole.

We males are naturally stronger, faster and able to make better decisions regarding the females in our lives. Your encouragement, nay outright favor for females is downright misandrous.

We demand you rectify the situation at once.

Sincerely,

Damien, James, Jared, and Merrick.

****

Cyn here again. I think once this becomes public, the rest of the conspirators will be in the doghouse for a long time. I can’t believe they’re a bunch of sore losers, all because they lost that stupid bet.

But there’s some hope. Here’s Miz Author’s response…

****

Dear Damien, James, Jared and Merrick,

A happy ending is misandrous?

Suck it up.

Sincerely,

MA

Females 1, Males 0 – by Deidre

You guessed it. The males lost the bet.

Are you surprised? I’m not.

The Council is an aristocratic misogynous group who are so stuck in the past, I’m surprised many of them even know what a computer is. Cyn mentioned the Mages and their hard-ons about their libraries of Magic, so it doesn’t take a huge leap to see that sharing information, any type of information, is pretty impossible. Not only for the Mages on the Council but everyone else. If knowledge is power, the Council is all about hoarding it for themselves.

That being said, I can’t imagine why it was such a big surprise to the males when they lost the bet. I really don’t understand male thought processes.

You should hear the bitching and complaining coming from the bathroom as my honey fights with his false breasts, fake hips and make-up!

I’m not going to even contemplate what he’s going to say when he sees the heels he has to wear.

*laughs*

At least I didn’t put him in pink like Lara is doing to Jared. (I sooo can’t WAIT to see Jared in pink!)

Damien is wearing a cute red sweater, knee length leather skirt, and thigh-high stockings; or he will once he STOPS PUTTING RUNS in the damned things. I have the most fabulous pair of knee high, high heeled boots. In deference to his never having worn heels before, they are wedges, not spikes. (oh and there’s plenty of ankle support.)

I also got him a hip length leather jacket, and a Prada purse. He has to carry his phone, keys, extra lipstick, gun and other miscellaneous items. Unfortunately his skirt doesn’t have pockets. *evil grin*

I’d LOVE to post pics of this, but we’ve been threatened on pain of death not to post any pics of our males. However that doesn’t mean one of their co-workers won’t do it. I’ll keep an eye out and link any pics that I find.

Uh-oh… he’s tromping around giving me black looks. I think he’s just seen the boots. I’d better go give him a couple of lessons on how to walk and call Bar’ella at the clinic to give her a heads up.

Cliché, or why my week sucked – by Cyn

And I don’t mean sucked as in a Vamp-needs-to-feed way either.

Remember how I told you about my bad night? Well it seems that the week isn’t getting any better.

On Monday night, I had two Elite ‘guards’ follow me, starting from right outside my apartment. They trailed me the entire damned night. So of course I couldn’t do ANYTHING productive except lead them on a tour of the city, making sure that those I spoke with understood enough double talk so I didn’t give myself or them away. Talk about exhausting!

On Tuesday night, they weren’t so obvious, but I knew they were there. Several of my acquaintances took great pleasure in pointing them out to me. The only good thing about Tuesday night was that I found a poor little puppy abandoned and dropped him off with Hans. (Megan loves me for this… Hans? Not so much.)

But I still had to be fairly subtle about it. Yes the Elite knew where Han’s warehouse is, but they weren’t close enough to get in and follow me. I’m pretty sure I lost them when I left, but dawn was coming and I had to get home. Taking the direct route allowed them to find me and track me back to the apartment.

On Wednesday night, James gave me a beautiful bracelet. Considering he’s never given me anything before, this made me instantly suspicious. I headed out to Luna Clinic where I was able to examine the charms on the bracelet and there was a microscopic tracking device. UGH!

I went outside and gave the bracelet to the first female that I found. I also paid her to amble around the city going nowhere in particular.

Just to make sure she didn’t get hurt, I kept a discreet eye on her as I followed her around via the rooftops. Yep the Elite were tracking her on their phones. But because of this, I wasn’t able to do _my_ job.

Last night, James came over and refused to leave. I told him I needed to go out and he offered to accompany me. Fine. And because this was pissing me off, I took him to the mall. And we shopped. Correction, I shopped and he complained the entire time which gave me a pounding headache, so I ditched him at my door. What? You thought I’d let him in for a little something-something? I. Don’t. Think. So.

Tonight I’m saying ‘to hell’ with the Elite and I’m inviting Deidre over for movies… males, especially male Vamps are NOT allowed. Let them keep watch out in the cold foggy night.

And the lessoned we’ve learned from this???

No *expletive deleted* good deed goes unpunished.